Mummies are arseholes…

They are cave dwelling life wreckers with the annoying tendency to tidy things up – moving them to strange alien contraptions known in some circles as ‘wardrobes’ and ‘cupboards’. They clean bathroom fixtures so that Daddies retinas are burned by the bright white and shiny metal lurking beneath the beard hair and toothpaste that have […]

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Attack of the sleep thieves….

Sleep time ended at 04:00 this morning when Bobbi woke for a feed so in I went to collect her from her cot like the dutiful servant I am. Just as she was drifting back off I heard shuffling outside my door – Nina was awake and mumbling something about her tent. I went through, […]

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I went for a run by mistake…

This morning after a lovely lay in (thanks Dan) I decided at the last gasp that it’d be a great idea to go and attempt the local park run.  This is a 5k run around the park up the road.  Fuck knows why I though this would be a good idea. I’ve ran three times […]

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It’s time to be kinder to ourselves.

Today I realised something. I realised that like so many others, I’m my own worst enemy. I’m too slack with myself in many ways but far too hard on myself at the same time. My inner voice hates me. That little monologue that only we can hear. Constantly dripping in the poison. Breeding self doubt […]

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A day in the life of me

This morning in my sleep deprived state I tried giving Bobbi pre loaded weetabix spoons – this was a mistake. She was covered in it and then decided that the world would end if she couldn’t fully embrace me with her ‘cement tentacles’ immediately. After cleaning her up and helping Nina get dressed I jumped […]

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Yesterday a friend and I took the kids to the cinema. It was like sodding Siberia in there and I could practically see the girls’ breath, so I spent most of the film shivering and cuddling up to Bobbi for warmth (For both of us – it was inhumane!)She was over tired so I spent […]

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Parent guilt…

It’s a well known fact that when children are born, they bring with them a shit tonne of guilt. Here are a just a few examples… You might eat something you like, have a hot bath or accidentally sniff booze whilst pregnant. You might have had an epidural – you total pansy. Surely all you […]

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